The Best for Adler

Before I gave birth I knew I wanted to breastfeed but I wasn’t opposed to the idea of formula. I had talked to many friends and family members before giving birth and I learned that sometimes breastfeeding was’t possible or that babies were happier with formula. People always told me if you can’t breastfeed don’t beat yourself up about it. Easier said then done. I wanted to write a post to get my thoughts out and give some advice.

First off; everything will be ok. The fact that you worried about your child and trying to do the best thing shows that you are a good parent. Secondly, go with your instincts and act on what you think is best for your child. So many people will give you advice, even Doctors and Nurses had general information and suggestions that weren’t working and we had to act on our own. Lastly; be patient. We wanted everything to get better immediately, and just get him better. It took some time and we learned how to read Adler and figure out what was working and what wasn’t.

With that being said, here is our story:

Adler took a few days to get the hang of breastfeeding and for a while we had to supplement with formula so he could get enough food but after two days he was breastfeeding great and we stopped with supplementing. I loved breastfeeding; being able to spend time with Adler and create a special bond was something I loved doing. Like I said in his one month post, he has always been a happy calm baby. He never really cries except when he is hungry and even then it’s more of a whimper than a cry. 

Around week 4 we started to notice something different in him because he seemed very squirmy like he was uncomfortable and spit up a ton. He use to sleep a ton and now it seemed like his tummy was bothering him too much to relax and go to sleep. He still was a very happy baby just uncomfortable and I felt so bad for him. Some of my friends had told me that their kids were fussy for no reason and then as soon as they were switched to formula they were happy and totally fine. Before we tried formula though we wanted to try some other things first.

 We thought it might be reflux so we started giving him medicine. That wasn’t working and we thought he might be allergic to milk because I had allergies when I was little. We decided to try formula and if that didn’t work then we would try soy formula. Formula seemed to work but not completely so we tried soy and that was even worse. So we decided that we wasn’t allergic to dairy. We went back to formula.

Deciding to switch to formula was one of the hardest decisions for me to make. People always said don’t feel like a failure if you can’t breastfeed but I totally felt like a failure. I cried when we decided to switch and I felt like people judged me when they saw me feed with a bottle. This was an issue that I just needed time. 

It’s ok to be sad. Again, it shows that you really care for your child and that you are more ready to be a mom than maybe you realized. I realized that just because I wasn’t breastfeeding Adler didn’t mean I loved him any less and he wasn’t disappointed in me. I missed the bond breastfeeding gave us but I found other ways to create that bond. I would hold him a little longer after feeding to snuggle with him, I would still cradle him while he ate, and I would sing to him. It was a hard thing to do and even though I knew it could be a possibility no matter what anyone said, it was something I needed to work out myself. 

Luckily we were able to go back to giving him breast milk but I can still understand why moms struggle with not being able to breastfeed. 

After talking to one of my friends who is a nurse, we decided to try feeding him the breast milk I have been pumping from a bottle. We thought he might have been eating too fast so we slowed him down. 

This seems to be working and for some reason he seems to be doing better with breast milk. I am very excited about this and hopefully we will be able to stop using pumped breast milk and go back to feeding him the other way.

We hope breast milk will continue to work and that Adler won’t be uncomfortable anymore. 

Adler is One Month Old!

I can't believe Dane and I have a one-month-old! We love Adler so much and we love watching him grow and change. In one month a lot has happened in his little life. 

I gave birth at 38 weeks and 4 days so my mom wasn’t planning on coming out for another week. Dane was able to take the full week off and it was nice to figure out how to be parents together in the first week and create amazing bonds with Adler. That next week my mom came out and it was so nice to have her here. She was very helpful and gave lots of good advice (she has done this 5 times, although this is her first grandchild). Dane went back to work that week and it was hard to say goodbye to him. 

Then my family came out for Spring Break and Adler loved meeting all his aunts. Here are some things about Adler’s first month.

-Last time we weighed him (at 3 weeks and 2 days) he weighed 8 lbs and 8 ounces which is the 23 percentile for weight. His next doctor appointment will be at 2 months. I might go weigh him before then.

-He is still in his newborn clothes. This makes me happy because he is still so tiny but we only have 5 outfits because everyone said they grow out of this size so quickly. I can’t wait to put him in new outfits even though that will mean he is getting bigger.

-He loves to have his hands by his face which is so cute.

-He has already seen two movies in the theater; Divergent and Captain America and he was great!

-He likes his pacifier but sometimes it takes a while for him to realize it’s in his mouth and start sucking on it. But I am glad he will take one.

-He likes it when we sing to him. Too bad I’m not a better singer.

-He use to eat every 2 hours but now it’s more like every 3 hours. He sleeps for 3 hours at night then wakes up eats and gives us another 3 hours of sleep. Sometimes he will sleep 5 to 6 hours. The first time this happened it freaked me out a little and I kept checking to see if he was breathing.

-He smiles a lot and it’s so cute. I don’t know if he is smiling at something we did or just smiling but I love it!

-He loves the car and his carseat and stroller. I can’t wait for it to get warmer so we can go on walks. P.S. Idaho, it’s almost May, it should be warmer!

-He is a great baby! He doesn’t really cry and he is always so alert. I think we will get the hang of sleeping through the night soon (or we hope he will). 

-He makes a ton of faces and we love them all! I will try to capture them all on camera.

We love Adler and we think he is the cutest thing ever (we might be a little biased). I love his big eyes and how he will just look at us. I want him to stay tiny forever and always be my little boy. 

We have been taking lots and lots of pictures!

I love my mamaroo!

He loves his stroller!

The newborn pictures Dane took of him and me 

I don't know if you can really see it but he is smiling! 

Dane got me this A necklace as my push present

I love this picture

I loved that he snuggled into both of us

Adler's First Easter

I was so excited to celebrate Easter with Adler because it was the first holiday he was here for. Even though he isn't even a month old and can't hold his own head up (though he tries all the time) I really wanted to do something creative to remember his first Easter. I also remember my mom doing something creative for Easter and I loved getting my Easter basket so I want to make each holiday special.

The Easter Bunny left his footprints! 

His first Easter Basket. 

 I can't wait to celebrate more holidays with Adler and Dane especially when he is old enough to participate!

Adler's Birth Story

I finally got around to posting about Adler's birth. It is kind of long because Dane and I both wrote the story from our point of view so feel free to read one or the other, both, or just look at the pictures. My story is in blue and Dane's is in black.

Jordan had just made a batch of s’more bars and we were watching the Food Network. It was starting to get a little late so we decided to turn in. Jordan asked if I would do the dishes so that they house would be clean if she went into labor. I convinced her they needed to soak.

As I was getting ready for bed I started to feel some tightening/pressure in my abdomen. I had been having Braxon Hicks contractions so I wasn’t sure if it was the real thing. They kept coming and didn’t go away so I decided to time a few. They were pretty far apart so I decided to go to sleep (They weren’t super painful yet). I woke up around 4 am and they were starting to become more and more uncomfortable. I started timing again and they were 10 minutes apart. They started to get closer; 7 minutes then 5 minutes so I decided to quickly jump in the shower. After I got out of the shower my water broke and they were 3 minutes apart so we decided to go to the hospital.

I didn’t know it, but she started having contractions at about 11 that night. She handled them like a champ and didn’t really let on that it was anything. Early the next morning I heard her get up but I didn’t know what for. Apparently her water had broke! She took a shower and continued to endure her contractions at about 10 minutes apart. I woke up at about 5:30 and she told me everything that was going on. Her contractions went from 10 minutes to 5 minutes. Then to about 3.

So I went and did the dishes. ☺

We packed up the car with our bags and Adler’s bag and car seat and took of for the hospital! I was really hoping I’d be able to dramatically speed to the room and proclaim, “My wife is having a baby!” but alas we live about ¼ mile from the hospital and the one traffic light we went through to get there was green. So much for the drama.

We arrived at Mountain View just before 6 am. They checked us in and took a sample to make sure that Jordan’s water did indeed break. They said it totally was and then told Jordan she was at about a 3.

We arrived at the hospital at 6 am and by now they contractions were painful. They took us to a room and I got ready for an exam. My OB gives you the option of getting your cervix checked so I had no idea if I was dilated or not. When I was changing my water broke some more and then they checked me. I was a 3 and 90% effaced and they said he was really low! My water kept leaking out so they tested it to make sure it was amniotic fluid. The contractions were getting more painful. We had taken a hypnobirthing class so I was trying to breath and relax during them but this was proving difficult. They came back and told me my water had broken so they admitted me. My body was shaking like I was cold and they told me that all of the hormones can cause this to happen. It was very annoying because it made relaxing very hard. I endured contractions for 5 hours and  zoned everything out. I felt bad because Dane was trying to talk to me but I couldn’t concentrate on both. I got some pain medication through my IV which helped a little but I was so tired and just wanted to sleep and the pain was starting to get worse so I asked for an epidural. When I first got pregnant I wanted to deliver all natural but I wasn’t opposed to the idea of an epidural– I was just scared of the needle. Every time I told someone that I wanted to go natural they looked at me like I was crazy and basically said “what is wrong with you?” I personally think that if someone wants to go all natural that is amazing and I totally support them. And good for them because I tried and that’s hard work! I got the epidural when I was 6 centimeters dilated. 

By this time her contractions where 2 minutes apart. I’ve never seen her so focused.  She was going through contraction after contraction and handling them like a champ. It was quiet and calm in the room and I almost nodded off it was peaceful in there.  The only thing that was noticeable was her hormones and lack of sleep had resulted in some body quivers. Little did I know it was like Rocky III where she was getting pummeled by Mr. T and she was just enduring it. She finally told me her pain was pretty high and decided to get an epidural. (10:45)

This was another thing that amazed me about her. Jordan is not one for needles. At all. One our first memories together was her getting a shot for strep and she was not  happy or calm camper. But today she simply took some deep breaths, lets herself relax, endured a big contraction right in the middle of the epidural and held completely still and before I knew it she was doing that dreamy eyed, I feel good, half smile and ready to lay down.

I thought I would freak out or cry when I got the epidural but I didn’t. It actually didn’t hurt at all (or my pain was so bad I didn’t care). I had a huge contraction when he was giving me the epidural and all I could think was “don’t move, breath, don’t move, breath.” After I got the epidural I was on top of the world. Epidurals are amazing! I talked more with the nurses and Dane and I felt so happy. I was so tired so I decided to sleep for a while. 

She became much more sociable after this. Actually rolling her eyes at my bad jokes instead of just blocking them out. They checked her again and she had progressed to about a 6 and was feeling very very good. After a Facebook update and some texts she drifted off to sleep. (11:37)

Her contractions began to space out a bit but the nurse came in at 12:45 and said she was at an 8! She said Jordan could go back to sleep for the time being. She tried to fall asleep but her shaking is pretty constant and couldn’t really relax. I tickled her back and tried to get her to relax and that helped some as she is not shaking as much or as constant anymore.

They came back and checked me again about 30 minutes later and I was an 8. For the most part I was dilating at a good pace. My OB was out of town so we had the on call OB Dr. Isebell. He was really nice. My contractions started to slow down and I was still at an 8 when they came back an hour later so they decided to give me some petosin to speed things up. He also broke my water and the nurse told us that I would probably be delivering within the next hour.

The doctor came in and we met him for the first time. Our Dr. Dr. Leavitt is out of town on vacation so this is the first time we have seen Dr. Isebell. He seems nice enough but we don’t have a relationship with him so it’s a little strange.  He measured Jordan again and she was still at an 8. They also popped her sack completely because it was still holding some water. He ordered some petosin to speed things up a little bit. They have steadily increased the petosin over the past hour and she’s still at an 8.

Everything is looking great otherwise and they think he could be here in the next hour! (2:26)

They came back a little before 3 and checked me again. The nurse said I was at a 10 and that it was time to start pushing. Tammie our nurse walked me through how I was going to push and then we started. I ended up pushing for 3 hours and finally he came out. Adler couldn’t get passed my pubic bone. I was so tired and sore and with the epidural I couldn’t tell if I was actually pushing. When I got to the 2 1/2 hour mark they said if he doesn’t come out within the next half hour I would need a c-section. I was NOT going to let that happen so I pushed as hard as I could. They continually monitored Adler because they said babies who hang out in the birth canal for a long time usually start to be in duress but Tammie said Adler was doing great and that really encouraged me. 

At 2:50 they came in and said it was time to start pushing. Tammie our nurse, was great in helping us know what was going on. As each contraction came Jordan would push 3 times at ten counts each. It looked so exhausting and I know Jordan and I both were hoping it would only take a few pushes to make some great progress. They told us that another first baby just pushed for over an hour so not to be too surprised if it took that long. 

Jordan pushed and pushed and was a champion. I couldn’t believe how strong she was and how much determination she had. But even after 2 and a half hours she had a hard time getting Adler past her pubic bone. Dr. Isebell came in and said that if in another half hour Adler wasn’t there, that we would have to do a C-Section. Jordan did NOT want that. She dug somewhere deep and said some of the most desperate prayers ever. She pushed harder than hour 1 and got him past her pubic bone right as Dr. Isebell came in to check on her.

Dr. Isabell came in after the half hour and when he walked in  he was very surprised and pleased with my progress and told me to stop pushing while he got ready. The last few pushes seemed very easy and I knew I was so close to seeing my son. Dane was telling me everything he could see and when Adler finally came out and I heard his little cry I was so overwhelmed with love. Dane started crying and of course I started crying as well. 

They got everything set up. I could see his purple head and lots of black hair crowning. Jordan pushed and pushed and Dr. Isebell helped him through the canal. He did need to snip Jordan a little bit to keep her from tearing but that was ok. At 5:51 Jordan gave one last push and out he came. I saw his scrunched little face and his first gasp of air without the Dr. needing to do anything. I choked up and looked over at Jordan and told her “He’s here! He looks great!”

The Dr. held him up for Jordan and she started crying when she saw him too. They had me cut his cord, which was surprisingly simple, and then they took him to get cleaned up while they patched Jordan back up.

He was here! I was so happy and I couldn't wait to hold him. He was so tiny and so cute. He was 7 lbs. 2 ounces and 21 inches long. I had to get an episiotomy because the doctor said Adler wouldn’t fit so I got stitched up while Adler got checked out then I got to hold him. He kept looking at me and I could’t believe he was mine. I love him so much! 

They kept talking about how incredible and resilient he was because normally babies that undergo that kind of labor are in a lot of stress. But he handled it like a champ, as did his mother. The nurses were talking about how incredible both of them were.  I couldn’t be prouder of both of them.

They gave him to me after they did all the initial tests and clean up and I took him over to give him to Jordan. The little snapshot in my head of that moment is a moment of family I will never forget. Tiny little Adler, with his alien shaped head and curious eyes looking all around with his lovely mommy. It belonged on a cheesy family pamphlet and was a perfect beautiful moment whose splendor and awe in description and photograph will never quite do justice to what I have impressed in my mind.

Adler is now two weeks old and he is perfect! He is still 21 inches long and he now weighs 7 lbs and 9 ounces. Breastfeeding is going well and we are starting to get use to the noises he makes so we don’t freak out at every little sound. I keep telling Dane he is so tiny and I want him to stay small forever but we are excited for what is ahead for our little family. The love we feel for him can’t be described and now I know what everyone is talking about. I love being a mommy. 

A little blurry but this picture is cute!

Like father like son

First stroller ride and he loved it! (and I love my stroller!)

My little super hero

He loves when daddy reads him books

Loving his bassinet 

A family picture